Loving Enough (The Enough Series Book 2) Read online

  “Amanda, I’m not here to judge you. This is an awkward situation and I’m just trying to make it easier on all of us. I don’t know what to do here. My life has been a mess lately, but what I know is that Austin loves Ryker and I will do whatever it takes to protect and support him.”

  Shock registers across her face. I didn’t mean for the last part to sound like a threat. I just wanted to explain my position. She takes a deep breath and wipes the tears from beneath her eyes.

  “I want you to know that I am not here for Austin. It wouldn’t matter if I was - he is in love with you and will never forgive me. I have someone back home. I only want is what is best for Ryker and I know that Austin is what’s best for him. Take one look at the two of them right now and I'm sure you will agree with me.”

  I look back over my shoulder to see Ryker on Austin’s shoulders, shooting basketballs into a moving basket. They both have humongous smiles and look like they belong together. Because they do.

  Their happiness melts into me as I turn back to her, smiling. “I agree with you there. We will have to do what is best for them. But I don’t want things to be uncomfortable either. It will take Austin time to get over the deceit, but I guarantee that spending time with your beautiful son will get him there eventually.”

  Our food arrives and I excuse myself to go collect the boys, who both complain. Throughout dinner, Austin and Ryker talk about the games they have played and plan their next round of amusements. Austin continues to ignore Amanda, but I do my best to keep everyone involved in the conversation. Thankfully, Ryker seems oblivious to the tension between his parents.

  The rest of the evening passes in a flash as we all play games and take turns taking pictures and enjoying the time we have. Shortly after ten o’clock, we drop an exhausted Ryker and his mom off at the hotel with plans to meet in the morning for breakfast and another day of fun.

  Chapter 49

  Rylee

  The next morning, Austin leaves at the crack of dawn to get his workout in before it is time to pick up Ryker. I do several laps in the pool before taking Boss for a leisurely stroll down the beach. The beach is serene at this time of day, before all the usual crowds descend upon it.

  As I walk with my big lug of a dog, my mind wanders to the implications of having a child become a part of my life. I have never considered kids to be a part of my future. Probably because of my own upbringing.

  My childhood was pretty good until my dad’s injuries took him away from the sport he loved - football.

  Jackson Ash, my father, was an amazing player. He was the top draft pick after his third year of college and was an impact player the second he stepped on the professional field of play. In his fifth year, he took a low hit coming across the middle. The hit broke his leg in two places. He did make a comeback two years later, but a few games in he blew out his knee on the same leg and could never return to the field.

  After losing the only thing he ever knew, he devolved. My mother, who only ever cared about the money, followed him down the rabbit hole. It just so happened that the rabbit hole included binge drinking and lots of party drugs.

  When my parents threw their epic parties, J and I were left to fend for ourselves. We were not allowed into the house no matter how long the party lasted. Often they would last for days. Over time, we turned the shed in the backyard into a passable residence. We added a mattress, toaster, some pillows, and a radio. It wasn’t much, but it beat the alternative when we weren’t over at Eric’s house.

  Growing up like that didn’t leave me with the overwhelming desire to procreate. We saw what it was like to have a normal family when we spent time with Eric, but it never felt like home. After our parents passed, we hoped for something better. It never came. That is when I realized that the only person I could count on was my big brother. Until recently, I still believed that.

  My brother and I were always an afterthought for my parents. I never want to put a child in that position. I can see it comes easily for Austin to put Ryker first and he seems to know how to relate to the boy. It concerns me that I might not be capable of doing the same. Would it be fair to Ryker or Austin if I can’t? I don’t think it would. I suppose all I can do is try and hope it works. What I know is that I love Austin too much not to try, despite my deep-seated fears.

  After the walk, I take a long, hot shower to clear my head.

  Austin comes in the kitchen smelling of soap and all things manly as he spins me into his arms for a deep kiss. Laughing, I extricate myself from him in time to pull my bagel from the toaster.

  “Hi love, you’re in a good mood this morning. Good workout?”

  He smiles as he snatches the other half of my bagel and pops a bite into his glorious mouth.

  “Why wouldn’t I be in a good mood? I have the most gorgeous woman in the world living with me and I get to spend the afternoon with her and my son. I don’t think it gets much better than that.”

  His enthusiasm is infectious. I let my fears go for now and enjoy the time I have with him. Heaven knows we have endured enough crap lately; we deserve good to come our way. It is time to embrace the future without fear of the past.

  “What are our plans for the day?” I ask between bites of my blueberry bagel.

  “I’m not sure. I thought we could ask Ryker what he wants to do. Or we could go to the beach or something. What do you think?”

  “Let’s just play it by ear and see what he wants to do. Then we can go from there.”

  “Sounds good,” he replies, before leaning forward and taking the last bite of my bagel into his mouth with a wicked smirk.

  To our surprise, Amanda declines to spend the day with us and sends us on our way with Ryker. I am relieved by the move, since it guarantees an animosity-free day. Ryker asks to see the stadium and locker room where his daddy works and I think Austin is going to overflow with pride at the request.

  We make the short drive over to the stadium and slide through security with Aus at the wheel. Austin gives Ryker the full game day tour. We start by walking down the tunnel to the locker room. We stop for introductions with a handful of players and Ryker’s eyes are as big as saucers every time.

  I hang back when they enter the locker room, not wanting to intrude on man-land. They aren’t in there too long, but long enough for Ryker to come out dressed in a miniature version of his dad’s jersey. We then make our way through the tunnel to the field where a few of the receivers, including Cardie, are running drills.

  Austin takes Ryker by the hand and leads him over to where one of the coaches is tossing balls to the receivers. In a flash, all the players are gathered around the two of them as he proudly introduces everyone to his mini-me. After a round of high fives and daps, Ryker takes off with Cardie and trails the ultra-fast receiver as Austin throws balls their way.

  Austin is one hell of a specimen and there is nothing sexier than watching him in action, even if it is just casually tossing a ball around. The difference in the velocity on the passes to Cardie and those to Ryker is stunning. My man is gifted.

  Following the workout at wide receiver, Ryker gets to take his shot at kicking a few field goals on the other end of the field, where Danny Allen, the placekicker, is putting in some work. Danny shows Ryker how to hold the ball, before kicking a few through the uprights and then trading places with the kid. Ryker's first few kicks are low and squirt sideways before he nails one through the goalpost. The field erupts in applause littered with hoots and hollers.

  It is hard to tell who is having more fun between Ryker and Austin, since they are both beaming. I have captured several of the moments both on video and in pictures. I am sure these are moments that will be worth remembering.

  Practice dies down and Ryker has collected a mass of autographs and one-of-a-kind memories. After leaving the facility, we pick up pizza for lunch and head home for a swim. Secretly, I believe Austin just wants to show Ryker his room and all the toys he bought, but I will never say it aloud.

&nb
sp; The pizza goes quick before Ryker and Austin race throughout the house, checking out all things child-centered. All I hear for the ten minutes following lunch alternates between awesome, wow, really that’s for me? and thanks dad. The smile on Austin’s face as they descend the stairs in matching black swim trunks tells me all I need to know—they are happy and having a blast.

  “Did you boys put on sunscreen?” I ask, wanting to be sure that, in all the fun, we remain at least partially responsible.

  Austin pulls me toward him, kissing me on the cheek. “Yes, dear. Now go change and come swim with us.”

  Ryker chimes in as I am about to decline. “Yeah, Rylee, come on. Dad says it will be fun.”

  The afternoon is a smashing success and I feel more at ease with the new twist in our lives. Ryker is an easy child to love. He is sweet and polite and totally reminds me of his daddy, so how could I not fall in love with him?

  The hardest part comes when we drop Ryker off and have to say goodbye. The next visit isn’t planned and sadness takes hold of Austin. I cannot imagine this will ever get easier, only more normal. It is time for Austin to get a custody arrangement down on paper. The unknown is too hard on both of them. They belong together, period.

  Chapter 50

  Rylee

  Two months later…

  Spring turns to summer without any fanfare. Austin and I have transitioned to a new normal. There has been no drama, no days straight out of a Hollywood movie, only ordinary days. After our dreadful first half of the year, we found our happy place—together.

  The days pass in a breeze of work and play. Austin sees Ryker every other weekend, either flying down to Texas or bringing the boy up here. It hasn’t been easy on him, but he is adjusting.

  Today is a beautiful July day and Austin left a few minutes ago to pick up Ryker from the airport. His son will stay with us for the next two weeks. I am nervous, but excited about the prospect. Ryker is a wonderful kid who worships his daddy. This will be the first time I will spend time alone with Ryker. I hope the boy and I can find common interests outside of his father.

  The intercom jerks me from my daydreams and Bella’s voice blares through the speaker.

  “Hey, girl, let me in. We have party planning to do.”

  I assess my clothes: black spaghetti string top and tan shorts. Good enough. Tomorrow we are throwing a welcome back barbeque for the team at Austin’s request. Well, request might be a stretch: he begged, I caved, and Bella demanded to help.

  I met Bella earlier this year at a charity event I accompanied Austin to. She is married to Austin’s friend, and favorite wide receiver, Cardie Dawson. We made quick friends after that night and have been planning this shindig for the past couple of weeks.

  The theme is luau and we have a stash of torches, brightly painted totem poles, grass huts, and a myriad of other decorations in the garage. Austin told Bella to spare no expense, and she didn’t. The party is tomorrow afternoon. We’re going to begin the decorating today so that tomorrow is easier. We are expecting around one hundred and fifty people all together, including the spouses and children.

  Bella bounces through the front door with shopping bags weighing down both arms.

  “Ry, I bought more stuff. Don’t kill me.”

  Her bubbly personality never fails to make me smile. I walk around the corner to see her setting the bags on the dining table. She is wearing flowing pink sundress and sandals. Her hair has grown out since I first met her and reaches the top of her shoulders now.

  “Hey, lady, what could you have possibly bought that we don’t already have?”

  She grins before explaining the glasses and paper lanterns. I don’t want to burst her bubble, but I believe those same Items are sitting in the garage already. We have enough decorations to decorate a few houses. The food will be no different, although we are leaving that up to a caterer.

  Bella and I set out to get the existing décor out of the garage. We drag everything into the back yard and organize it by purpose. The indoor decorations are left by the door and the others we walk about the yard and leave in the position they will go. We first set up the two grass huts that have hand painted signs, designating one the alcoholic bar and the other the soda bar. The third hut will house the do-it-yourself snow cone machine for the kids.

  After an hour, most of the things have found their home and I am standing on a ladder, trying to hang the last of the white lights around the patio. Without warning, Ryker and Boss come barreling out of the door and take the ladder down. I am left dangling from the roof by my fingertips and yelling for Ryker to grab the ladder. He is too busy chasing after Boss, leaving me to consider dropping to the ground. My fingers hurt from holding the hot shingles, but the drop would be painful. This is why you should always wear shoes.

  My arms are tensing up and I am about to let go when a pair of strong arms wrap around my legs and take my weight.

  “Hey gorgeous, what are you doing up there?”

  “Haha. Ryker and Boss knocked the ladder down, leaving me here to hang. Get me down, please.”

  His grip loosens as he laughs. “All right, baby. Just drop and I’ll catch you.”

  The laughter worries me, but I know he would never hurt me so I let go and land cradled in his arms. His eyes sparkle with mischief as he looks at me. He holds me close for a moment before placing a quick kiss to my lips and setting me down. As my feet touch the cement, Ryker and Boss come barreling through again, nearly knocking me to my ass.

  “Ryker, slow down and come here please,” Austin says with a stern tone.

  Ryker slows his sprint and heads in our direction. “Yeah, Dad?”

  “Did you see that you knocked Rylee’s ladder over and she couldn’t get down from the roof?”

  Ryker looks up with disarming shock on his little face. “No, Dad. I’m sorry, Rylee.”

  He comes over and wraps his ten-year-old arms around me. I hug him back.

  “It’s okay, buddy, your daddy saved me.” I give Austin a playful smirk with the last remark.

  Ryker wiggles out of the hug, taking Boss by the collar. They are off and playing fetch in a matter of seconds. It is so sweet to watch a boy and dog bond. Ryker has been a great addition for Boss; he adores that little man.

  Bella comes crashing out of the patio doors with a handful of tiki torches as Austin pulls me in for a heart-stopping kiss.

  “Get a room, you two,” she mocks with laughter in her tone.

  I lay my head against Austin, wishing we were alone.

  “Looks like I’d better get back to work,” I mumble into his hard chest.

  He holds me tight. “Nah, I think you should play with me instead. Maybe take a swim.”

  He drags me towards the pool in jest. My laughter and protests are ignored. We stop just shy of the pool when he looks down and smiles at me with trouble in his eyes.

  “Don’t you dare do it,” I say, trying to push out of his grip.

  “Do what? Whatever do you think I am going to do?”

  Not wanting to end up drenched when I still have so much to do this afternoon, I pull on my best serious face.

  “Don’t even think about throwing me in that pool.” Lowering my voice, I add, “I swear you will not get any for a month.”

  He throws his head back and laughs a deep chortle before taking my gaze. “Oh baby, we both know you couldn’t resist me that long.”

  Knowing I cannot stop him, I grab a hold of his shirt as he picks me up and tosses me into the pool. My grip on his shirt is strong enough that he loses his balance and falls in after me. Soaked from head to toe, he pulls me into him, laughing against my neck before nipping it lightly.

  “So no sex for a month, huh?”

  His warm breath against my skin and the feel of his hard body tell me there is no way I will make it a month. Hell, I don’t want to make it another ten minutes.

  “Yep, none for you, buddy.”

  His laughter is infectious. Bella and Ryker are now st
anding on the edge of the pool, laughing it up with him.

  “Austin, let my girl go. We have work to do,” she says with a playful sternness.

  “Yeah, let me go,” I repeat as I push away and swim to the stairs.

  Bella hands me a towel and I look back at my gorgeous man. Even wet and fully clothed, he is a remarkable sight. No question I won’t hold out on him. No woman in her right mind would. I throw a wink his way before sloshing to the house to change into dry clothes.

  Before I walk inside, I hear Austin ask Bella if everything is set. When I glance back at the two of them, they both smile mischievously. They are up to something and that cannot be good news for me.

  Walking through the foyer after changing, I answer the buzzing intercom. Cardie’s voice wafts through.

  “You guys have room in this mansion for a few more?”

  A few moments later, Cardie and his two sons come strolling through the door dressed in swim attire. Ryker is thrilled; he has really bonded with the older of the two, Jackson. Looks like the boys are planning a play date while us women are stuck preparing for their party. Go figure. Boys will be boys.

  Bella and I spend the rest of the afternoon readying the house for tomorrow. After an afternoon of swimming, Cardie and Austin declare themselves men by cooking out burgers for us and hot dogs for the kids.

  Shortly after nine, Cardie and Bella head home and Austin settles Ryker in his room for the night. I am standing in the kitchen enjoying the last of my margarita when my stud of a boyfriend walks up behind me, smelling crisp and clean - pure man. His arms circle me from behind, his chin rests on my shoulder, and I melt into him.

  My arms across his, we stand in the moment and enjoy the feel of one another. There is no place in the world I would rather be than in his arms. His head turns and his lips find the spot right behind my ear. With a tender kiss, he whispers, “I love you.”